Here are some signs that your kid might be the victim of a bully but unable to tell you about it!
· Some of your teen’s belongings, such as a ipod or a bike, are suddenly missing.
· You notice minor injuries such as a bruise on the arm but your kid just shrugs it off
· Your child starts skipping school or saying he or she is sick
· You kid is getting lower marks
· You notice your child is crying all the time
· Your child doesn’t eat, isn’t talking and generally withdraws
· Your child lacks friends or appears to have friends you’ve never met
· Your child takes out anger on younger children in your family
If you spot any of these warning signs there is a number of things that you can do. You can ask your teenager if there is a problem. Usually you will get a denial but if you keep pressing you will probably get answers.
Explain to your teenager that saying nothing is the worst approach, because intimidation and violence typically escalate, beginning as verbal threats and building to physical abuse. If a teen doesn’t ask for help, the situation will only get worse.
Assure your daughter that you won’t get angry if she tells you what’s happening to her and tell her you’re concerned for her safety. Make sure to keep your promise as often parents hear things they find quite objectionable.
Here are some steps in handling the problem.
· Ask your daughter who she would be most comfortable seeking help from at school. It’s usually best to start with a teacher she knows; that teacher will probably involve a vice-principal or the principal.
· Make sure the school staff support your kid and aren't actually siding with the bully somehow
· Find out from other parents if their kids are having trouble with the same bully. If so, you can go as a group to the school administration.
· Ask the principal what steps he will take and check back later to make sure he has followed through.
· In extreme cases where you kid has been battered or even stolen from, you may want to work with the school to bring in the police and lay charges.
Kids are particularly in danger of becoming the targets of bullies if they’re unhappy and have low self-esteem. Spending time with your teens and encouraging them to get involved in activities they’re good at and helps boost their self-confidence so they are not targets.