The first thing you need to realize about newborns and sleep is that they do not necessarily need sleep! They don't have biorhythms like we do or need eight hours sleep at night. It is very abnormal for a newborn to sleep all night so you might as well see it as a natural process that can't be helped. No matter what you do your baby is going to wake up in the middle of night anywhere from once to several times and demand to be fed, changed or simply patted on the back.

The key to managing a newborn is to relinquish fantasies about being in control of the situation. Sleeping like eating or defecating is not something you can force a little person to do. However you can make your baby more comfortable by teaching the child positive attitudes towards bed. One way is to feed it just before bed so it thinks of the bedroom and crib as positive. This also helps the child get rid of any separation anxiety and associating bedtime with being abandoned.

There is no set rule or guide about how a newborn should be sleeping. Some are more active then others and most kids just don't do what you read in books.

If your current daytime or nighttime routine is not working for you, think about what changes you can make in yourself and your lifestyle that will make it easier for your baby to get to sleep. This is a better approach than trying to change the behavior of a newborn. It may seem like the newborn is suddenly controlling your schedule and sometimes even your entire life but that is the way it is when you have a baby. Accept it. And stay away from books that try to liberate you by telling you to ignore your own biological cues. Your instincts know best how to calm your child and make it feel secure and safe so it will sleep.

If you change your behavior to fit in with your babies you accomplish several important things. First of all you build your baby's trust in you. A baby that understands that you comprehend his or her needs is less likely to scream and cry in the first place. If you opt for traditional baby training methods such as letting the kid scream it out then you might be creating a more neurotic individual. Be careful before you choose a baby training method as many of them teach you to mistrust your own instincts. Don't forget that as the mother of a newborn that you possess natural abilities to understand your newborn and all of his or her needs whether it be for food, comfort or sleep.

Bottom line is that all you can do is go with the flow for a while. Yes you will lose sleep. However sleep deprivation is all part of having kids. Above all don't take it personally. Your kid has no idea what he or she is doing to you.