Working Mommy Burn Out

Depression and burnout can creep up on a busy mom especially if she is a busy professional like a lawyer as well.  Most working moms have that stubborn Type A overachiever style of personality very few are willing to admit a weakness, such as exhaustion or depression. This is because most professionals are trained to at least impervious to any outside stress as well as to not stop pursuing a matter until it is concluded.

 Some moms on the experience a gradual worsening of symptoms and others are felled by it seemingly overnight with no warning. It really does depend on the individual and the types of stress they are under.  

Yet another insidious fact of life when it comes to depression and burnout is that not everybody experiences all of these symptoms. Some people may only find one sphere of their daily existence affected, such as their physical wellness and not appear to have problems in other areas such as work. However usually depression begins with physical symptoms that include disturbances in sleep, extreme weight gain or loss, excess snacking or no appetite, fatigue, lack of energy, loss of libido, digestive problems, headaches, difficulty concentrating, memory problems, inability to make a decision, imagining suicide, sadness, shame, guilt, irritability, emotional withdrawal, crying spells, restlessness, neglect of personal hygiene, inability to keep up and substance abuse. 

Burnout is a type of depression but the symptoms of fatigue, apathy and negativity are extreme. The person may be so tired that they may not be able to focus at all on work. They become overwhelmed by a loss of control over circumstances in life (such as a spouse leaving) or by being unable to meet deadlines. Ironically the last thing that some working moms on the verge of burnout are exhausted. 

Many use their Type A personalities to keep plugging on against great odds of success. In fact many who are actually burnt out seem to be incapable of cutting back on the number of hours they spend at work. Many people can't get out bed when they are burnt out. It is often accompanied by illness and an abuse of recreational drugs.  By the time a person is burnt out he or she is usually also worthy of a diagnosis of clinical depression. Some doctors will also diagnose this as chronic fatigue symptom. This individual needs to come out of self-imposed isolation and talk about problems.

A life coach can also help a person suffering from depression cope with inappropriate feelings of shame and know the difference between how one feels about reality and what is really going on. This can really help a depressed or burnt out depression gain perspective and strength and move on to reorganize their lives so that they feel more health.  Sometimes what is needed is a regiment of psychological or psychiatric treatment that may or may not include drugs to treat the exhaustion or depressive aspects.

No Excuses!

An article in the Montreal Gazette written by columnist Jill Barker called Turn Excuses Into Action talks about the main excuses that couch potatoes use to get out of exercising. 

One of the biggest excuses, especially for busy moms, is that they are already wound up from chasing after kids all day.  This can no longer be an excuse. For one thing chasing kids all day can be stressful. The purpose of exercise is to release stress, not create more of it. 

If you need to be with your kids all of the time then consider exercising with them.  Play games on your front lawn or in the park with them such as ball, Frisbee or hide and seek. You can also do things like play hula hoop with your kids, hop scotch or jump rope. Yet another thing you can do is just take your kids out for an exercise session based on simple workouts. Do ten sets of simple exercises as a group.   Other athletic activities that kid love are hiking, swimming and climbing. 

Sometimes it is not the kids that are in your way when it comes to getting an exercise program off the ground. An excuse that a lot of people use is 'I'm not a gym person.' You don't have to go to a. Biking, canoeing, swimming, running or even taking a walk in the park count as legitimate forms of exercise.  This way nobody is staring at your body or if you are wearing the latest in spandex fashions.  And unless your kid is a teenager he or she is probably not going to care what you are wearing if you decide to go through a jog in the park with them. 

One of the main excuses that people use is 'I am not in good enough shape to exercise.' This of course is a self-defeating excuse with no way out of the dilemma.   This includes people that feel too fatigued or too stressed to exercise. Unfortunately the more you lie around the more you are just going to want to lie around. This is a vicious circle because it can lead to depression, obesity and other problems.

 Once you feel that you are getting out of shape the best thing to do is nip the problem in the bud before it gets worse. For one thing you are setting a bad example for the kids by lying around all dyad. Barker suggests that the only way out of this one is to keep your goals attainable and start out slowly.  If you are so fatigued that you can't do much more than walk around the block then by all means get up off the couch and walk around the block.  Ask one of your kids to take that walk around the block with you. Every little bit you do will help. In other words, get off the couch and exercise anyway!Â