I'm a little bit disgusted. I went to a baby shower today but it seems like the friend who threw the shower did it more for her then she did for the mother. The mother to be really likes Victorian things, is a vegetarian and is a bit shy.  So she was a bit aghast when she walked in to find herself confronted by clotheslines hanging with hand me down clothes, big meat lasagna and women playing 'who has the poopy diaper.'  However the woman who threw the shower has more this sense of humor.   They also served chocolate cake when I know that the mom-to-be's favorite flavor is lemon. 

My point here is that he intention of a baby shower is to throw the expectant one a party she will love! The intention literally shower the mother with blessings, gifts and the good will of her best friends. It is not a religious rite, although as late as the forties and fifties, baby showers were thrown in conjunction with a baptism or a christening. 

If you are asked to throw a baby shower for a good friend don't tell yourself that all that matters is that you are motivated by your heart. You also need to make some kind of attempt to please her.   Sit down and take the time to figure out what makes her tick, what her taste is and what her favorite colors are. Try to make her as happy as she can be on that special day.

Consciously ask yourself a few questions about the mother. Who is she? What does she like? Is she religious? Is she a feminist? Is she a busy multi-tasker?  Is she struggling financially? Is she sentimental, practical, business-like, shy, formal, friendly?  Is she a stylish individual or is she happiest kicking around in a sweatshirt? Does she drink or is she a member of MADD? Any dietary restrictions?  Does she hate pink?  Can you see her child wearing a black leather jacket instead of the usual furry little pom poms? 

These are the type of things you have to ask yourself before throwing the shower. For instance if she hates arts and crafts don't even think of making a plaster model of her swelling belly –she is going to hate you for that and store the thing in the garage. Sit down and make a list of your friend’s likes and dislikes. This will help inspire you to manifest an event that is uniquely personal to her. 

Rites of passage are deeply personal so it is very important that you don’t string a diaper clothesline across the living room of a stylish status conscious friend or serve lots of cake to a mother with gestational diabetes. Do a little research and make use of available resources.  The biggest mistake that most people make when they throw a party for another person is making the theme more personal to them, than the mother. Those Barbie dishes and towels that you adore collecting, might not suit the mother-to-be who may throw them up on eBay or give the away the first chance she gets!