The Pampered Child Syndrome

Lately, I have become quite interested in this book by Dr. Maggie Mamen called The Pampered Child Syndrome which is all about that one kid that takes over your entire family's priority. In fact these kids can take over everything including family harmony, financial considerations, respect for others and even common sense. In fact the other day I was in a restaurant just because of such a brat. I was just sitting down to a wonderful meal with my friend, who was a new mother in forties when suddenly her darling new child started bawling. She looked at me, and said, 'I'm sorry. We can't have this dinner. Little Delilah June wants to go!' The other lady I was with looked at her in shock and said, 'But we just got here…the child does not control how long we stay here for dinner.' The mother, a slightly insecure hysterical type kept talking about how we all had to do what Delilah wanted or Delilah would hate her. She had no idea that she should control the situation and seemed afraid of losing the approval of a two year old child.

This type of syndrome where innocent little kids push you around and cause havoc in everyone's lives is called Pampered Child syndrome. Don't think this can't be a problem because this same woman let her child take control of her entire social life for the next few years to the extent that she never got to date anyone and she lost all of her friends because she could never leave the kid with a babysitter. At age five little Delilah June was still nursing because even though she had sharp teeth, her mother did not have a strong enough will to tell her that it was time to stop.

If you do have this type of problem or know someone then Dr. Maggie Manen's The Pampered Child Syndrome: How to Recognize It and How to Avoid It might help. She has also written other books about boundaries, tough love about raising kids including Who's In Charge?, Laughter and Love and Limits.

It's a good thing to take away power from a little kid who has too much power. For one thing, children know it is wrong for them to have authority and power that they are ill equipped to handle. As they grow older they become control freaks and develop serious social and psychological difficulties.