Should You Spy On Your Kid’s FB or Myspace Page

Should you look at your kids's facebook or myspace page? They say that ignorance is bliss. If you do peek you really might learn something about your child that you would rather not know.

Before you take a peek you better have a good reason for invading your child's privacy. Many psychologists feel that teens need their own space within which to learn about processing their feelings and act out their own little dramas. It is not always necessary for you to be involved in these matters. Allowing them to express their own conflicts is part of the maturation process.

Of course it is hard to think of yourself as 'snooping' when these pages are very private. The justification in a parent's head is 'Why shouldn't I look if everyone else is…?'

Think of it this way. Would you like it if your kids were looking at your page? Most psychologists don't recommend snooping. Nothing builds responsibility and accountability in a child more than being trusted to figure out things on one's own. Your child must know that it is okay to make a mistake or two.

Still the other side of the argument is that these sites are social networking sites for adults and kids just happen to be on them. That is why these sites pose so many risks for teenagers.

Keep in mind that there is a fine line between taking a peek at someone's site and spying. It also may be hard not to become obsessed by what you see on some of these sites. It is just the nature of 'the beast.'

However there are some times in life when it is okay to spy. For instance if you expect our child is engaged in dangerous behaviors or relationships and you are having difficulty asserting your rightful parental control. If you feel your child's welfare is in danger it is definitely time to take charge. This is true if you think your child is at all involved in drug abuse, an abusive relationship, self-mutilation, drugs, pornography or anything else. In that case make sure you snoop in your kid's room, backpack, cell phone records and internet profiles in an effort to help him or her!

If you just casually want to take a look at the page all you have o do is make an appointment with your child to look at it. This shows your child that you have some respect for him or her even though he or she might be very irritated that you had to ask at all!

How to Be the Best Mom Ever

Do you want to be the best mom ever? Do you want to impress your kid with everything that you can do? Here are some tips for just being a little more together.
The first thing you can do is play video games with your kids. This really helps you bond with your child. You can have revealing conversations with your kid that you might not have otherwise face-to-face. You can also sometimes use video games to work out hostilities with your kid or to increase a kid's self-esteem (by letting him or her win a game.) A really great thing to do is let your kid teach you how to play a game (even if you already know how, because it really does increase the child's self-esteem to help and guide you for a change.
Keeping a diary can help you be a better mom. It can help you vent, problem solve and handle your own feelings as you try and handle your child's development. When you write things down it helps you be objective about what is going, especially if you have been fighting with a mad teenager who is making everything very personal!
Hanging out with your friends shows your kids the importance of cultivating relationships and having fun. Watching you is how they learn to socialize with others as well.
It is also a nice idea to let your kid be interested in what you are interested in and not always coddle just to the kid's interests. Let your kid help you with one of your hobbies. You might be surprised at the results.
It's okay to let your child make his or her own choices. It helps develop his or her self esteem. If your kid makes a bad choice it is okay to let it happen but within reason. For instance if your kid decides to wear no shoes out in the snow that may not be the kind of decision you want to support. However there is probably no harm in letting your kid wear one purple sock and one red sock to see what the reaction of others is. The idea is to not be a control freak all the times and let the person make his or her own mistakes.
It is also okay to say no to your kids. You do not have to be all loving and all nurturing. They will respect you if you say no.